Middle-Aged White Guys on the Run!

Middle-aged white guys are being forced out of jobs everywhere as The Ruling Class discovers that they are being paid 2% more than a recent graduate could be paid.

The findings of a study by Barfleigh’s and Associates in Miami, FL indicate, “that while a middle-aged white guy who’s been with a company for 5 years or more may have practical knowledge and experience, they tend not to be able to just follow the orders and dictates of upper management without questioning the premise of the order or dictate.”

Ms. Lourdes Byudimarc, Vice-President for Human Resources of Haatpantz Inc., a local consulting firm adds, “Middle-aged white guys may bring a certain level of continuity to a company that cannot find the procedure manual: It’s easy to stop them in the hallway and ask a question; it’s even kind of fun knowing that with their weak bladders and prostate problems you’re causing a certain delay to them relieving themselves. Uh, where was I, oh yeah, the point is that it’s more profitable to cut costs than to have that kind of knowledge available.”

“It’s a problem of expectations” said Darius Pendejo-Cochnillo, 22 – a recent graduate from an online university. “These old guys want things like health insurance, vacation pay, a lunch room. What do they think this is? Europe?”

Where do middle-aged white guys go after they lose their jobs? “Oh, we don’t worry about that,” remarks Byudimarc, “as long as they don’t try to collect unemployment insurance. That could throw the budget numbers way off!”